For Real Toads: the Shakespeare challenge

Kerry says she's gone "old school" for this challenge, which makes it right up my alley, since most of the old schools I attended have long since been torn down or, possibly, turned into condominiums.

I haven't been able to respond to challenges here at the online writers' group Imaginary Garden with Real Toads for a week or so, due to a headache and some other health issues which plague my life, but I think I'm back.
Please forgive me for not commenting on the poetry of other members, but my poor brain has been in rather bad shape.
When the idea of using something from Shakespeare actually got me thinking "Oh, what fun!" I was just thrilled. I was so sorry to have to pass up Ella's challenge, and Fireblossom's, and so happy to think I could try something here. It isn't wonderful, and "it ain't art" but it might be my chance to sneak back into the Imaginary Garden again.

Shmoop photo

Scene: A basement office in the depths of Parliament Hill, Ottawa.

            In the middle, a model of a singularly unprepossessing prison.

A thunderous drum roll announces the entrance of Prime Minister Harper, along with three of his cabinet minions.

  

First cabinet minion:     Thrice Mrs. Harper’s cats have mewed.

Second cabinet minion: More than once, the poor have whined.

Third cabinet minion:    Harper decreed — it’s time! it’s time!

  

First cabinet minion:      Round about the prison go,

                                           In the poor and sickly throw,

                                           And those guilty of internet use,

                                           Heap their heads with much abuse.

  

Double, double toil and trouble; 

    Fire burn, and caldron bubble.

  

Second cabinet minion: Throw in all the union members

                                          Roast the lefties in the embers

    

Third cabinet minion:    All those who against us vote

                                          Throw a noose around each throat

  

Double, double toil and trouble; 

    Fire burn, and caldron bubble.

  

First cabinet minion:     Scientists who dare to claim

                                          There's such a thing as climate change

                                          Imprisonment for them arrange!

  

Double, double toil and trouble; 

    Fire burn, and caldron bubble.

  

Second cabinet minion:  And the subject our wives can't speak of

                                           Lest they should begin to think of...

Third cabinet minion:    No, no, don't say it! Not out loud!

                                          The very thought can draw a crowd...

Double, double toil and trouble; 

    Fire burn, and caldron bubble.