Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Exotic setting where I've never been

and where I wouldn't want to go...
Izy's Out of Standard challenge today at the Imaginary Garden with Real Toads asks us to write about an exotic holiday destination, with a catch. It must be a place where others go, but I would not.
As it happens, this has been on the Canadian TV network, CBC, twice. Both times I had to close my eyes while my husband watched that wild and woolly Newfoundlander, Rick Mercer, climb BC's 9000-foot Mount Nimbus, crossing a swinging suspension bridge at a mere 8050 feet.
It scared the wits out of me. Both times. I don't care if my husband asks me to sprinkle his ashes from the top of a mountain, from a hang glider, from a parachute, or from the top of the CN Tower, it ain't gonna happen.

Rick Mercer, right, with his guide. Contemplating the bridge on the way to the top.
if some ill fate should place me here
above this ghastly chasm
I'll just sit down and perish here
from a lack of food, and a surfeit of fear
After a successful crossing, Mercer smiles for the camera. He only fell once.
I blinked my eyes at the TV
at the moment when Mercer fell
between the boards that form the bridge
a thousand storeys from hell

of course he knew that he was safe
and knew that he wouldn't die
he was wearing a harness and line
but 'twas nearly the end of I

safe at home in my chair I sat
trying to catch my breath...
there's nothing Kiplingesque about that
to jest at such height with death*

At the summit, looking down at death the bridge.

CBC and Mercer Report photos

* ref. Rudyard Kipling, Ballad of East and West


Susan said...

Too funny! And I agree totally, I'd be sitting down to perish right next to you! The Kipling is a good fit for this Mercer stunt.

Anonymous said...

a good chuckle, Kay. I like the captions you put on the photos, too. it only takes *one* fall from there - and you'll have no other! ~

Powell River Books said...

Strapped or not strapped, I could never do that. My fear of heights would have had me in a fetal position just thinking about it. - Margy

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Wowzers! I'm with you, kiddo. Aint EVER gonna happen!

Isadora Gruye said...

totes in agreement with the heights. "Because it's there" never reason enough, at least for this toad. Thanks for the chuckle this evening Kay and viva la

Kerry O'Connor said...

I am not afraid of heights but I do have a healthy respect for them - and no way I'm crossing that bridge either.

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari OM
Strewth! In me
The Adventuress
says 'yes'
- but,
the vertigo
says 'no'!!

YAM xx

Mama Zen said...

This is so clever!

Gattina said...

Nice poem ! I can't understand people who play like this with their life. After all we only have one !

Margaret said...

I don't even like being at the top of a ladder! Yes, I agree - even the IMAX theaters are too much for me.

Helen said...

Love the poetry .. love this best:

I don't care if my husband asks me to sprinkle his ashes from the top of a mountain, from a hang glider, from a parachute, or from the top of the CN Tower, it ain't gonna happen.

Huge smiles.

Marian said...

oh good lord, i feel queasy just reading this. i have a heights thing, especially for walking on things i can see through. ARGH.

hedgewitch said...

Couldn't agree more--you'd have to knock me out, tie me up,and carry me up there and then I'd just sit and starve to death, as you indicate. Laughing at your unwillingness to disperse your husband's remains to the winds. I'm with you all the way.

Tammy said...

Your poem is tops!

Small Kucing said...

I love the view there but am afraid of heights. Guess am one of those who "vacation" from home type of people :)

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Sam Edge said...

I worked in the mountains and in helicopters all through my twenties and I never had any fear of heights but looking at this almost made my poop my pants. eeeeek

Cool spot you found KAy and ya I'll pass also.

Kay said...

This is just the sort of crazy stunt that my son would LOVE to do!

Jennifer A. Jilks said...

Wasn't that a moment!

Susie Clevenger said...

I would die a thousand deaths at just the thought I was to take one step out there...l so agree with your words...I am playing writing catch up. :)