Followers

Saturday, July 27, 2013

Doubling up for the Imaginary Garden


At the Imaginary Garden with Real Toads the other day, Corey (aka Herotomost) challenged us to: "write something using a few different literary devices to pour your heart out to us...be it happy or sad, angry or glad, rant political, rant philosophical, but use some of the tricks of the trade to emphasize the emotional content."

Today, Joy Ann (aka Hedgewitch) invited us to write in the form of an etheree, a 10-line poem beginning with a one-syllable line and increasing by one syllable each time until it reaches 10 lines. It can also be written in reverse, starting with 10 syllables and decreasing to a one-syllable line, or can be a 20-line poem using a combination of the two.

from
Wikimedia Commons

By David Lorenzana
I decided, instead, to do a combination of Corey's prompt and Joy's prompt. If this were to have a name, it would be "Destructive Greed" or something equally appropriate, but I can't come up with anything properly poetic.

sad
sadder
wondering
how the rich
can justify their
destruction of our land,
our water supply, our air,
the fish we catch, the food we eat,
for corporate profit, when the rich
can’t breathe more air, drink more water than I
Kay Davies, July 27, 2013



19 comments:

hedgewitch said...

How true, Kay. But they sure can make more money than you or I! Thanks so much for working with the form, and for ranting a bit in a good cause.

Loredana Donovan said...

The rich get richer at the expense of others, this is true. Well done on the form and theme for both prompts.

PS: the link on Corey's post took me to an older poem you posted for another prompt.

Fireblossom said...

Isn't that the truth?

Grace said...

Reality bites sadly ~ The rich gets richer but perhaps their water is branded, smiles ~

Kay L. Davies said...

@ Loredana — Thanks for the heads-up. I would never have known. I tried to remove it with Mr. Linky's whatsit, but it stayed, so I posted a correct link under it.
Thanks again.
K

Hannah said...

The brevity for what could be a wordy rant makes your statement SO much more powerful...love your closing line, Kay!

jane hewey said...

as the poem spreads out into 10 lines, so the issue spreads out. thoughtful, well-worked piece, Kay.

Susie Clevenger said...

Wow you rocked both challenges and made a powerful environmental statement also! Awesome!

Gemma Wiseman said...

We are all equal in what we really need, but some choose the greedy highway. A clever progress of ideas.

Kerry O'Connor said...

Such thoughts definitely make me sad.

Marian said...

damn good question. argh.

Helen said...

Love the way you share insight with us through poetry .... so nice.

Herotomost said...

Kayyyyyyyyyy!!!! You are always so clever. Mixing prompts and doing a fantastic job while you are at it. I suck at most prompts, let alone trying to mix two of them together. You have to be pretty happy with how this turned out, emotional and raw with a device that Hedge gave you as exclamation point to the feeling. Great job Girly Q!!

liv2write2day said...

There's a similar theme criss-crossing our poems, Kay. Nicely done. This is my first time here and at Toads. Have linked an old post from 2010: http://liv2write2day.wordpress.com/2010/09/29/one-shot-wednesday-flight-off-of-half-dome/

Other Mary said...

Good rant! And you closing statement is perfect:

...when the rich
can’t breathe more air, drink more water than I

Akila G said...

Bang on!

Lolamouse said...

Go to the head of the class, Kay, for nailing BOTH prompts! You speak the truth!

(Thank you for pointing out my missing letter in my last poem. I HATE having typos and/or mistakes. I'm a bit obsessive myself!)

Jim said...

Teaching school and writing never gets us far in a material way but I know there is left a legacy and new life for those we have helped. There is not a price on that.
..

Susan said...

Simply powerful. And true. Do you remember the bumper sticker "Eat the RicH"?