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Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Another for the Toads: internal monologue


Just when I think I should lie down because it's exhausting taking care of a post-surgical husband, an always-hungry Golden Retriever, and my own unfit self, I decide to take a little peek into my favorite garden: the online writers' group, Imaginary Garden with Real Toads.
Kerry's challenge for today is too much fun to pass up, even when I'm so tired. She asks members and contributors to write an internal monologue. Kerry says the end result should be a piece of writing which reveals the character of the speaker, as well as the one who caused the problem addressed in the monologue.
So, with the permission of my better half, whom you know as Richard Schear, my intrepid photographer, I've written what he was probably thinking about his doctor after his recent preventative surgery.

   

THE ALBERTA PATIENT

the surgeon’s taken out, no doubt,
something I can’t live without!
I fear I’ll never, ever eat
another plate of rare red meat
Photo by Kay Davies, Aug., 2012
or chew a carrot—
I can’t bear it!
I feel so weak
I’m almost meek,
but if that doctor shows his face
I’ll tell him this is a disgrace!
I used to be a big, strong man
but now I know not what I am—
a shadow of my former self—
out to pasture, on the shelf,
tired, retired, retiring!
don’t want to eat a single thing,
especially what the nurses bring,
the whole experience makes me weep
and then it makes me fall asleep
twenty hours of twenty-four
until I fear I’ll wake no more.
can’t find my slippers on the floor:
can’t bend down because I’m sore,
and visitors are such a bore,
flowers they bring but nothing more— ah,
such a dread funereal aura.
I’m tired of thinking, and so, mayhap,
I’ll take another little nap...

Kay L. Davies, September, 2012

16 comments:

hedgewitch said...

I can only imagine what was going through his mind! This was warm and very funny, Kay. Best wishes for a quick and complete recovery your husband's way.

Susan said...

I suspect this is right on the mark! A very good read too.

Sherry Blue Sky said...

I LOVE this. You have so totally nailed it!!!!!!! All the best to Richard and if only the mails were faster, I'd send him something good to eat!I've seen those hospital trays and they aint pretty!

Helen said...

This is a priceless rant!!! Give my best to hubby.

Fireblossom said...

Poor guy. I hope he is feeling much better than that, now.

Daydreamer said...

Oh, bet wishes for your husband to be fighting fit and well again as soon as possible. Hospital food sucks at the best of times though so, I can understand him not wanting to eat.
Taking care of others is tiring so don't forget to take care of you, too.

Mary said...

Kay, this is really very sad. I hope he will be back to his eating and healthy self soon. The two of you have really gone through an ordeal.

Kay L. Davies said...

@ Mary — it really wasn't too too sad. Scary for a while, but we have taken a whole new look at our priorities, and that part's not sad.
I've had inconvenient chronic illnesses as long as Dick has known me, and he has been very healthy, so in some ways this has brought us closer together.

Thanks, Toads and everyone, for worrying about my big fella here. He and the dog went for a walk without me today, so they're both feeling quite pleased with themselves.

Mara said...

Oh, I hope he will feel better soon. Nothing worse than not being able to put the trash out!

jabblog said...

Great stuff, Kay, and very funny, but I'm sorry you had to take inspiration from Richard's unfortunate condition. I hope he makes a speedy recovery and rediscovers his health and strength.

Kerry O'Connor said...

Ah, the poor man, Kay. No-one likes to feel so helpless and laid low by pain and weakness. This lament is a heart-felt cry; I'm so pleased he is recovered enough for a walk.

Penelope Notes said...

Hi Kay, Just read this to Bill and he got quite a chuckle out of it! Glad Dick is out and about with Lindy again. Our best to all three of you. :)

Kay L. Davies said...

@ Jabblog — I couldn't help it, Janice. Dick had actually suggested I take a photo of him to use for the meme "Thursday Theme Song" but when Kerry suggested an internal monologue on Real Toads, the first few lines of this ditty just sprang to mind. I did check with him before I continued writing it, however.
K

Kay said...

Awww... poor Dick! I'm so sorry. It's such a drag to recuperate after surgery. This is exhausting for you too. Be sure to be kind to yourself too, Kay. And please give Dick a hug for all of us.... gently.

Gattina said...

Poor Dick ! I hope he feels a little better every day!

Kateri said...

I think you summed up many patients' feelings after surgery very well! (I'm a med-surg nurse turned home care nurse, so I have seen plenty of post surgery patients)